Love & dating
How you go about it with someone you have just met: the first message, the reply that takes its time, the silence that settles in. Those first minutes say more than you would think.
8 tests available
Free personality test: discover your avatar
Eight situations in which everyone thinks they are more patient than they are: a message left unanswered, a disagreement about money, an evening with nothing planned. A Persona puts them to you and you tick what you would really do. At the end you get your card: one temperament family out of nine, one avatar out of more than 80.
Love test
First contact
How you go about it with someone you do not know.
More about the love personality testFlirting test
Your style
How you go about it when someone catches your eye.
More about the flirting style testRelationship test
Your partner style
How you are over time, once the relationship has settled in.
More about the partner style testConflict test
When it gets tense
A disagreement, a silence, a wrong word: what you do when the mood shifts.
More about the conflict style testCharacter test
Your week
Everyday life, other people, ambitions: character shows outside conversations too.
More about the character testOverthinking test, when it plays on a loop
An unanswered text, a curt line, a long night, and what you do with whatever comes back.
More about the overthinking testEnvy test
When someone else wins
A friend’s promotion, a feed full of beaches, and what you do in the second that follows.
More about the envy testMood test, when the room tightens
A room that tightens, a voice on the phone, a grumpy colleague, and what is left of it by evening.
More about the mood-catching test
One test, eight situations, one conversation
Every test on this page is run by a Persona, a woman or a man depending on what you pick at the top. She puts eight everyday situations to you, one after the other: a first message that stays unanswered for three hours, an appointment the other person forgets, a free evening with nothing planned, a disagreement about money on a weeknight.
For each one, three answers are written in advance and you tick the one that sounds like you. None of them is the right one. If none fits, you write in your own words in the box: a small AI model looks for the written answer closest to your sentence, and Strugggl does not keep it.
Count one minute. At the end, the Persona asks for your e-mail address to show you your card: your temperament family, one out of nine, and your avatar, one out of more than 80. The address opens your Strugggl account, with no password, and the card is kept in your space, with a private link if you want to show it to someone.
Which test to take
One test per theme, all built on the same four dimensions. Pick the one that answers the question you are asking yourself right now: how you go about it with someone new, how you are once the relationship lasts, what you do when things get tense.
Flirting & attraction
What you do when someone catches your eye: step closer or wait, joke or watch, follow up or let it come. The test looks at your flirting style, without grading how well you flirt.
Relationships
What happens once the relationship has settled in: what you say or keep to yourself when something bothers you, the room you leave the other person, the way you picture what comes next. Habits that weigh on two.
Conflict & communication
A disagreement, a silence, a word out of place: what you do when the mood changes. You swallow it, you bring it up calmly or you hit back, and each of those choices costs something.
Personality & temperament
Daily life, other people, what you want: character shows outside romantic conversations too. This test follows your week, alone and with others.
Emotions & sensitivity
How you live what runs through you and what you show of it: from the restraint that keeps everything in to the feeling that spills over.
How to read your result
Each test places you in one of the nine temperament families. The family describes a tendency in the situation of the test, not your whole character: you do not flirt the way you argue, and from one test to the next the result can change. That is normal.
No family is better than another. Each has its strengths and its traps, which the page of your family describes one by one, along with the Personas that suit you best.
The test card is a glimpse. The card that counts takes shape in your conversations with the Personas on Strugggl, and it is the one that refines your avatar and your nickname. Take a test again whenever you like, or try another angle.
Text by Inès Vesper, a pen name of the Reflets editorial team, text prepared with AI tools.
The nine temperament families
Nine temperament families, which each test brings out in its own way. Find the one that sounds like you.
Your answers, your card, your account
Free, with an e-mail address at the end
The test costs nothing. At the end, the Persona asks for your e-mail address to show you your card: that opens your Strugggl account, with no password, and your test card is filed in your space, next to your conversations.
A game, not a validated psychology tool
The test gives a glimpse of your temperament from four dimensions. It makes neither a diagnosis nor a clinical profile, and its results can vary from one angle to the next: we do not behave the same everywhere.
What Strugggl keeps of your answers
Strugggl keeps your choices to work out your temperament family and file your test card in your space. A sentence you write yourself is only used to find the closest written answer, and is not kept. The Persona who asked you the questions only remembers that you took this test and what came out of it.
Four dimensions, several traditions
The tests on this page do not count points of shyness or charm. They cross an old idea, the mean (in Aristotle, each quality of character sits between a deficiency and an excess), with more recent frameworks of psychology: self-disclosure, conflict styles, motivations, character strengths.
Each question lights up one of these four dimensions, two questions per dimension in a test. For each, three answers: the deficiency, the mean and the excess. Depending on where your answers place you, you land in one of the nine families: eight for those who lean one way or the other, one for whoever stays at the mean everywhere.
Opening up
How much of yourself you show, and how fast: from the caution that watches before it speaks to the impulse that says everything at once.
Where it comes from. Irwin Altman and Dalmas Taylor (1973) describe a relationship as an onion: people reveal themselves layer by layer, from the surface to the intimate, and each moves forward when the other answers in kind. Aristotle saw courage as a mean between fear and rashness (Nicomachean Ethics, book III), and Peterson and Seligman list bravery among the 24 character strengths of their classification (2004). We apply it to how much you dare to say about yourself. Two families: the Guarded Heart and the Headlong Heart.
Reacting
What you do when something hits you: you swallow it, you bring it up calmly, or you answer in kind.
Where it comes from. Kenneth Thomas and Ralph Kilmann (1974) sort the ways of handling a disagreement into five modes (competing, collaborating, compromising, avoiding, accommodating), along assertiveness and cooperativeness. Their statements are paired so that no mode sounds more flattering than another, like our three answers. Aristotle put gentleness between being unable to get angry when you should and flaring up (book IV, chapter 5). Two families: the Quiet Soul and the Short Fuse.
Going toward others
Your way of building a bond: the independence that needs no approval, the warmth that looks for agreement, and everything in between.
Where it comes from. David McClelland (1961) describes among human motivations a need for affiliation, belonging and harmony, stronger in some people than in others: it is the side of the Honeyed Voice, and the Independent Streak is its far end. Aristotle put friendliness between the flatterer’s obsequiousness and the temper of someone who can only displease (book IV, chapter 6).
Aiming high
What you look for: the calm of a road without bumps, or the challenge that pushes you a little further than planned.
Where it comes from. The work of McClelland (1961) and John Atkinson (1957) on achievement motivation observes that people who aim high prefer goals with middling chances of success, and avoid both the too easy and the too risky. That is the shape of our three answers: the Gentle Road takes the easy one, the Icarus Wing the too risky one. Aristotle spoke of the love of honour, with a mean that has no name (book IV, chapter 4).
The research behind the four dimensions
The idea that too much of a quality can turn it into a flaw has come back in psychology. In 2011, Adam Grant and Barry Schwartz published in Perspectives on Psychological Science an article that starts from Aristotle: they argue that such inverted-U effects are widespread and often missed, because studies look at only a narrow range of values. That is the frame we draw on to sort the answers into deficiency, mean and excess.
This work is inspiration, not proof of our tests. No study has validated the situations we put to you: we wrote them, two per dimension, and they place you in a family, nothing more. The result describes a tendency in the situation of the test, not your whole character, and two tests on two themes can give two different families.
What is Strugggl?
Once you have taken the test, you can go further: create your account and talk to the personas, AI characters, women and men. Their attention has to be earned, they do not give in easily, and that is what makes the exchange interesting.